Time for a Change?
You know those moments when you realize you've done exactly what you promised yourself you wouldn't keep doing...again?
When I launched Awake at the Wheel, I was looking for a place to share something closer to the real me.
Lost track of that pretty fast.
It was supposed to be a space unhindered by past constraints and “brand alignment.” A conduit for closer to the bone expression, with a freer reign on the spectrum of topics I might explore.
But, I quickly fell into an old, safe voice, covering tried-and-true topics. What’s come out is not fake. It’s real and, I hope, valuable and valued. And, I enjoy doing it.
It’s just more constrained and contained than I wanted it to be.
Why? Fear.
It’s safer that way.
I know the creative box that’s allowed me to make my bones as a writer and creator for nearly two decades. It’s comfortable. It’s about becoming a designated expert, purveyor of opinions that hopefully rise to the level of wisdom, or curator of experts in a well-defined area, so people know everything they get will be largely “on topic.”
It’s how you build a following, then a living. The more linear, proven path. One I’ve walked for many years. It’s served me well, and cultivated a lot of goodness.
Problem is…
It’s increasingly misaligned with the kind of writer or maker I’ve yearned to be. If I’m honest, from the very beginning.
What I truly want, and have always wanted, but been afraid to inhabit is this…
The freedom to go beyond being be just a domain expert in a demand-rich niche to being someone you turn to for a different kind of experience. One where you’re more drawn to the slightly off kilter way I see people, problems, slices of life, and the world more broadly. To the sensibility and unique lens I bring to anything that pulls my attention. To the way I string together words and sounds and images, with one eyebrow raised, tongue often squarely planted in cheek.
If I’m being honest, what I, and probably every person I’ve ever known who identifies as a maker, artist, or provocateur of taste, really want is for the special flavor of weird that caused me pain as a kid to be seen and celebrated as an adult. And, to make you think and feel. To wake up to what’s real. Regardless of the focus or topic.
What I want is to earn your trust, so that whatever I decide to write about, or produce or make, even if it’s something you never thought you’d care about, by the end, you will. And, you do. And, it’ll be worth the ride.
What I want is to spend less time conveying information, and more time evoking emotion, seeding insight, and provoking possibility.
I’ve always known that’s how I want to show up as a writer. And, a Maker. It’s more the Gladwell model. Less about the topic, more about the take.
Every once in a very long while, I hit that mark. It feels amazing. Then, I retreat. Hiding behind the safety of the known and the narrow. Niching down. Toning it down. It’s safer, more certain. It’s not wrong. But, it’s also not nearly as in service of my soul as I’m craving my primary devotions to be these days.
If you’ve hung out with me for anything more than a hot minute, you know there’s a lot more edge and humor to the way I take in, and process the bizarre universe we’re attempting to inhabit, nay control. F-bombs fly like commas. Social commentary leans toward sarcasm. Hot takes can get pretty pointed. Still with the same sense of grounded kindness I try to bring to all I do. It’s always in the name of inviting, not othering. Lifting up, not holding down. Lightening up, even when heaviness abounds. But, my public writing and recording voice don’t often go there.
Similar deal with the broad stroke of topics upon which I tend to focus. Human flourishing has been the domain I’ve deepened into for more than 30 years. It’s a big umbrella, with intention. I try to approach it in a grounded way, with a different take. Use the spotlight I’ve been blessed to amass to share other voices. I enjoy this. But even that has begun feeling increasingly limiting. There’s so much more, so many other directions, concepts, happenings, and wildly unrelated nooks and crannies that whisper to me.
So, yes, I can and have and will continue to write, produce, talk and create around the domain of flourishing and human potential. But, my particular infinite-layer soul cake contains multitudes that also tug me toward business, entrepreneurship, innovation, creativity, craft, making, art, writing, publishing, production, the future of work, media, AI, and beyond. Stuff that doesn’t fall easily into the basket of any one realm, regardless of how broadly it’s drawn. Yet all fall into the ever-expanding gaggle of curiosities that I’ve thought deeply about, have a take on, and a way of expressing, that I think is, maybe, unique and valuable enough to share.
Give you an example…
Earlier this week, a side-eyed take on publishing channeled out of me and into an essay. It’s something that’s been simmering for quite a while as I explore starting into my next book. Having been traditionally published for more than 15 years by the bigs, I’ve been questioning what the format of a book “needs” to be these days. Wondering how traditional publishing’s lock on the definition feels a bit misaligned not just with how I’m thinking about books, but also what people want and need in an era of micronized attention and super-sized pain.
A gentle commentary on the state of the industry, couched as a riff on why books are the length they are, poured out of me. I believe it’d be interesting to anyone who writes. To anyone who has a book in them, yearning to get out. To anyone already deep into the industry or path. And, it would explain a big, nagging question to readers about why every advice book is a particular number of pages, when half the time you’re thinking, “this really could’ve been an article.”
As soon as I was done with the draft, I was like, that felt good, but I have nowhere to put it. It doesn’t fit into the current Awake at the Wheel vibe. Then I thought, maybe it’s time to change the vibe, rather than continue to hide.
So, that’s the plan…
Broaden out the field of coverage. Expand the vibe. Both here, and maybe by contributing to other publications.
But, as the line goes, no plan survives the first punch. Hoping you’ll stay with me as I experiment in closing the gap between perpetually yawning curiosity and authentic expression.
First up, coming next week, is that essay on the bizarre reason advice books are all the way they are. And, why, as writers and readers, we might want to do some reimagining.
Thanks for continuing to be a part of this Long Strange Trip meets Magical Mystery Tour. Love you humans!
With a whole lotta love & gratitude,
Jonathan
Jonathan—
What you’ve written here feels like the soft click of a latch, the door finally swinging open to a room you’ve always known was there. A room where the air smells of ink & woodsmoke, where the windows have been flung wide & the light comes in slant, a little wild, a little unexpected.
I read your words & I see a quiet shedding. The safe coat hung by the door. The box of well-worn tools set down. You stand there—barefoot maybe—ready to work with what your hands were always meant to hold: not just what fits, but what calls. What sings.
There’s truly no need to explain yourself. We'll welcome the unvarnished lens. The off-kilter angles. The strange flavour that once left you aching & now might finally feed us all. What you call weird, I call the thing that will keep us coming back—not for the topic, but for the way the topic becomes yours in the telling.
So let it come, whatever shape it takes.
We’ll be here, ready.
We’ll follow the light through that open door.
That’s the room we want to be in, too.
YES< YES< YES!!!! I think it is what we are all looking for in this wild crazy ride through life. Let the emotion spin, keep spilling the info as you please, but let's all be REALLY WHO WE ARE!