Grateful Yearning: How to Balance Joy and Discontent
Wake-Up Call #36
Half of us have become disconnected from the act of feeling.
Largely as a survival mechanism, a way to sidestep the firehose of input that would crash our emotional systems if we let it all in.
No judgment. No shame. Cope as you will.
The other half is over-feeling, every word, glance, comment, headline, image, individual, conversation a living trigger for unrelenting rage, sadness, joy, futility, elation, devastation.
Then, there’s the third half (math was never my strong suit). The “Yes, ands.” Flipping, almost violently from over to never feeling.
Grace, it seems, has left the building.
Nuance, space for the truth of complexity, is a thing of nostalgia.
How, I’ve been wondering, do we feel on a level that gives our lives, and society writ large, the vibrance and color and energy and breath and connection needed to feel truly alive, while also protecting ourselves from falling into the crevasse of overwhelm or numbness that seems to lie hidden just beneath the surface of modern-day existence?
Waiting to swallow us whole.
I start to wonder if gratitude might help.
So often, in my life, gratitude has been the ladder I’d lay across the abyss, the one that allowed me to feel the dizziness of uncertainty as I stepped anxiously, yet hopefully, across each rung in the name of peace and possibility, without falling into the darkness of judgment and isolation.
It’s the knotted rope we all have the capacity to drop down to ourselves when we find our beings swallowed up by the yawning chasm of edge-case emotion, ranging from despair and desperation to outrage and annihilation.
Gratitude is the light we turn on that allows us to see, acknowledge, and maybe even embrace the invitation presented by moments and interactions that may well begin akimbo with sharp edges, anger, and misunderstanding, yet, once illuminated, reveal the equal potential for clarity, reconciliation, and redemption. Growth and connection.
Gratitude is about what is right, in what can feel like a sea of wrong. A tether to a semblance of peace, in a world that feels torn.
And, the thing is…
Gratitude doesn’t demand, as so many believe, that we disavow our discontent.
It simply acknowledges that we can hold two seemingly opposing feelings in one heart and mind. We can be grateful for what is good, yet still own, deeply feel, hope for, and work toward, a future that is different. Better.
Grateful yearning.
Appreciation with a side-car of discontent.
That’s the game.
The thing that keeps bringing me home to myself.
It’s the state I’m exploring as I reflect on the year that’s closing, and look forward to the year that’s about to unfold.
And this week’s invitation.
Own what’s real.
Feel the feels.
Give thanks for what’s right.
Do the work to fix what’s wrong.
Offered, as always, with an open heart.
With a whole lotta love & gratitude,
Jonathan
Wake-Up Call #36 | Grateful Yearning.
Two steps today:
What are you grateful for? Start small. Spend 5 minutes, stream-of-consciousness and jot down or record whatever tumbles out. It’s okay to acknowledge the good and right and true, even when you know there’s still work to do.
What do you yearn to be different? Again, start small. Leave shame and blame at the door and focus less on what got you/us here, and more on a vision of what might be better as we step into and explore what we’d love to see or make happen in the year to come.
What seemingly innocuous, impossible to reject action or step can you take toward making your above answer manifest in the world? All the while, keeping a sense of gratitude in your heart and mind.
Think on it. Feel into it. Move with it. Then, if you’re inclined, share what comes up with the community in the comments.
PS - In January, I’ll be sharing a monthlong, five-part “New Beginnings: 2025” series on the Good Life Project® podcast. Be sure to tune in, and follow the show on your preferred platform, so you don’t miss an episode.
Here’s an easy link to be sure you’re signed up to follow, grow, and glow.
Nothing for sale, by the way, just a month of learning, guidance, and action-taking to help you get the year to come going with more intention, connection, and joy.
I'm such a big fan of gratitude. It's life-changing. As the year winds down, I've been working on a 525 list - 525 moments over the past year that I'm grateful I was alive to experience. Little things, big things, happy things, and not necessarily happy things but things that led to something good - growth, a deepening of a connection, etc.
“Appreciation with a sidecar of discontent.” That kinda captures it for me too. I’m working on holding two disparate feelings at once - gratitude for what I hold dear and despair for what I’ve lost. It’s a hard act and truthfully I fall off the high bar often but the work is to stay present with both of them. Thanks for a great podcast Jonathan.